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I haven't had the time to post anything for quite some time...broken computer and broken life seems to be the relative reasons for my negligence.
However, today I have come to a stark realization concerning my life, or the lack thereof.
From the moment my feet hit the floor in the morning, to the time I finally collapse from total severe and damaging exaustion; my day is enveloped in what I 'have' to do. There isn't any facet in my life anymore that has one iota to do with what 'i want'. That isn't to say there aren't plenty of wants, I am simply saying my wants go unnoticed. This contimum of rapidly increasing pandamonium is leaving me empty, alone, depressed....angry..just a whole dominion of 'argh'.
I don't think anyone cares. The kids do not for sure, how could they be expected to?
Chad and I do not get along at all, seem to constantly be on different pages.
I realized today that we are both experiencing the same exact life...and issues. you would think that would bring an understanding between us instead of placing such a great divide in our marriage. such is not the case.
At any rate, why does it matter if wants are met, when life is so blimey blah?
I don't know.
And so it goes on..the cycle of life without meaning, life without happiness. Life.
How does one change what is
However, today I have come to a stark realization concerning my life, or the lack thereof.
From the moment my feet hit the floor in the morning, to the time I finally collapse from total severe and damaging exaustion; my day is enveloped in what I 'have' to do. There isn't any facet in my life anymore that has one iota to do with what 'i want'. That isn't to say there aren't plenty of wants, I am simply saying my wants go unnoticed. This contimum of rapidly increasing pandamonium is leaving me empty, alone, depressed....angry..just a whole dominion of 'argh'.
I don't think anyone cares. The kids do not for sure, how could they be expected to?
Chad and I do not get along at all, seem to constantly be on different pages.
I realized today that we are both experiencing the same exact life...and issues. you would think that would bring an understanding between us instead of placing such a great divide in our marriage. such is not the case.
At any rate, why does it matter if wants are met, when life is so blimey blah?
I don't know.
And so it goes on..the cycle of life without meaning, life without happiness. Life.
How does one change what is
